We finally found an English-speaking primary care doctor in the French Countryside. We got great medical care — with a side of weirdness.
The Appointment
The three of us (Jason, Juliana, and me) had our new patient appointments together. The doctor sat us across from him, interviewed each of us about our health history, and recommended vaccines and preventative tests that made complete sense to me as a former RN. I felt good about the care he offered.
Then things got strange.
Completely unsolicited, and partly in French, partly in English, he told us we had made a mistake moving Juliana here — and that we should go back to the USA as fast as possible.
He went on a rant. France is going — in his words — “to the shit.” She won’t get a good education here. Her job prospects will suffer. Her earning potential will be limited. France is on the decline in every way. He had plenty of other political opinions too (weirdly, mostly about American politics), which I’ll spare you.
Jason and I were speechless.
Geeze. We just came in for a checkup.
The Awkward Position We Found Ourselves In
We left the office feeling out of sorts, caught between three uncomfortable realities:
- We need to get along with this person — he’s our doctor.
- We were genuinely shocked by his confidence in sharing unsolicited opinions about our personal lives.
- As parents, a small voice in the back of our heads whispered: What if he’s right?
What We Actually Talked Through That Evening
That night, we sat with it. And we realized a few things.
In some ways, he’s just wrong. There are plenty of statistics to counter the “France is declining” narrative. But in other ways? There’s a grain of truth. The US is enormous. It has world-class (and world-expensive) universities. Median salaries are higher. The industries are bigger, the incomes are higher, the opportunities are wider.
But then we asked ourselves the real question: Are income potential and university prestige actually what we’re optimizing our parenting for?
What We’re Actually Raising Her For
Our goal is to raise a person who can navigate adulthood well. Someone who:
- Is resilient when she faces challenges
- Can adapt and find her way to happiness, even when circumstances change
- Sees the world from multiple viewpoints and chooses the one that feels right to her
- Is confident, compassionate, curious, and bold
Those qualities are the real building blocks of success — and they work anywhere in the world.
We’re also not taking anything away from her. She still holds an American passport. She still has a US college fund. If she goes back, she’ll bring with her cultural and language fluency she never would have developed had we only ever lived in the States. We’re not limiting her options. We’re expanding them.
The Bigger Lesson
And finally — we realized we don’t give a $h!t what he thinks (pardon our french)
No matter where you are in your journey, everyone has an opinion about what you’re doing. But only a few people’s opinions actually matter. Don’t let the loudest voice in the room be the one that steers you, especially when it belongs to someone who doesn’t know you, your family, or what you’re building together.
Baguettes and Butter 4-eva,
❤️ Raina, Jason, and Juliana
